Never say never

A friend said to me very recently that I’d changed so much in the last few years.  All my life I’ve heard this said to me, even my brother said that every time he sees me I’m doing something different. I’ve been called a chameleon, a hedonist and even a dilettante and my response was always that it was natural for a person’s character to evolve, that to stay the same was to be inert. This time though, I listened to what she said and took it to heart because I realised that even I had fixed rules for myself. I was the girl who wanted a career, to be independent, to have educated opinions, I wanted to write, live like a nomad, play music and know a lot of people. I was never going to marry, rely on a man for financial support or have a mortgage, and I was never ever going to have children. These were my rules that I thought unbreakable. Then I met Bruce. In 2006 he asked me to marry him and I said yes without hesitation. In 2007 he had me put on the deeds to his house (and thus the mortgage). We married in July. In 2008 I took time off work to write, which meant he had to support me financially. He still does. Now the never ever is happening too. I was wrong about a lot of things. I always thought I had what it takes to be a writer, but little else. I still think I have what it takes to be a writer, but I can also be a lot of other things. Writers, in fact, most creative performers, are butterflies, changing as often as we need to while maintaining the same core identity.


About Sharon

Writer, bibliophile, dreamer and student of everything
This entry was posted in ME ON WRITING, The writer and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Never say never

  1. vanyieck says:

    My wife had a similar set of ‘nevers’. Now she’s seem all of them come to fruition, we laugh at them. It’s amazing how presumptuously we approach life. That’s why a good sense of humor is always a welcome companion in life.

  2. Jaymie says:

    It amazes me how many different things we can be. More than that, many of them at the same time. Here’s to the adventure!

  3. jenniferneri says:

    Yes. yes. yes. We do not need to lock ourselves in to one role. We are many things all at once.

    I was in a similar situations as you. I was not going to get married until I least had my phd. I met my husband on a trip, and that was that. My life took a turn I never foresaw. Wouldn’t change a thing.

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